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Mama Deb
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Mama Deb [userpic]

First. My mother-in-law is a wonderful cook. This is not even in doubt. We had turkey, a dressing made of chestnuts and mushrooms and fresh herbs and artisan bread and pumpernickel, fresh beets, my pilaf (with that stuff, who needed pilaf?), homemade cranberry sauce (with Splenda) and a big salad. And gravy. And finished with a...bottomless apple pie. Meaning that there was only one crust and that was on top. Given that that, too, was made with Splenda, it was quite nice. A little heavy on the cinnamon, but very nice.

We also had wine and finished with coffee, and began with mulled apple cider.

It was just the family - Jonathan's parents, us and Jonathan's brother. And his dog, but Betty doesn't get table food, so she just camped out underneath.

And the conversation was good around the table and except for one moment, things were calm.

Jonathan invited his brother for a seder. Not, you see, thinking about the logistics of having a vegetarian for a seder. That knocked me out. One of my biggest problems is that if I have something set and decided upon, a change in plans can stall me out. Once I regroup, I'm fine, but my first thought is panic. Not that I don't have six months, of course. But we discussed that calmly and went back to dinner and that was that.

Mom went to her bedroom after dinner and I read while the boys cleaned up, and then we watched some TV, and somewhere around 6:45 decided it was time to go home. Mitch was out on a date from , an online Jewish dating service and I wanted to be home by 8 and it just seemed time to go. So we got our coats and I tied on my headscarf and Mom woke up and wanted to talk.

Okay. Fine. What she wanted was to go over the headstone for her brother's grave. Not the most pleasant and certainly not the most urgent of discussions, but okay. I got out a book and read and played with Betty. And it got later. And Jonathan discovered his uncle's will, and had to read it while my mother-in-law lectured me about eating.

Some of you read my food diaries. I don't have the best diet in the world, but it's not bad. It's not, however, following her diabetic lowcarb obsession. And when I say that I do this or that, she says she doesn't. And I knew that, but what does that have to do with what I do? She only buys challah rolls; I buy lovely pullapart whole wheat challot. But we got through that and then there was will talk and it was over an hour since we were going to leave and I was missing Survivor and I'd forgotten to set the VCR. My fault, of course.

Between the lecture and the wanting to go, I built up quite the head of steam and I think we argued until halfway to Brooklyn on the subway. :(

I need to grow up *so* badly. *sigh*


Having a vegetarian for seder is easy. Just make everything pareve except for the actual meat part of the meal (the turkey or chicken or roast or whatever you're having.)

I'm sorry you & he fought. I'm sorry that you got the food police lecture. It sucks.

I've had a vegetarian for a seder too. I had Israeli salad first, then I made vegetable soup instead of chicken soup (I probably still have the recipe if you like -- the key is tomato-based stock) and there was kugel and another side dish -- I think it was tzimmes. In fact except the kugel it was all vegan.

A rabbi I knew used to say that once you get though all that maror you're not hungry anymore anyway.

It's gettingt hrough the mental block, you see.

I was planning on having chicken stew one night and pot roast the second - two one pot meals that are better made in advance.

I shifted gears, and I'm taking advantage of the fact that he eats fish, if it's not farm bred. So, everyone gets ratauoille and salad and mashed potatoes. He'll get veggie chopped liver when everyone else has the soup, and he'll get a salmon steak (cold, no reheating fish) and the rest of us will have meatloaf. Not much harder than my original plan, and ratatouille should be great for a seder.

As for the moror - your rabbi obviously doesn't use fresh horseradish. :)

I see, one pot meals are harder to plan around. But that sounds great.

I know you don't really use recipes, but I recommend the ratatouille recipe in the Chabad Passover cookbook. That cookbook is mostly good for people who use no prepared products at all (which is a fine thing, if it's your thing) but the ratatouille in there is awesome. (I guess in the end it's just cutting up vegetables? But it works)

And I know almost no one who uses the fresh horseradish. I did one year, and it was not as strong as its reputation. Must have had a bad batch.

Oh, dear.

I seem to have left the wrong impression. Mitch is great. He will happily eat whatever is given to him, and he's NEVER made any sort of remark about what any one else eats. He'd even be willing to eat veggies cooked with meat. He wouldn't be happy, but he'd do it. He's about as far from food police as anyone could be. (Which is probably why we're all happy to make sure he has plenty of food he can eat.)

It's my mother-in-law, who doesn't understand why I'm not obsessing on carbs, that I have problems with.

It's your MIL I was referring to as the Food Police.

cranberry sauce in splenda is awesome. and so easy to make! i love it so much i'm buying mroe cranberries!!!!!

i dont even use sugar anymore b/c of the holiness of splenda