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Mama Deb
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Mama Deb [userpic]
There is wisdom in my friendslist, and knowledge, too.

What does one wear to an informal backyard, afternoon wedding? Other than a big straw hat?


a linen suit perhaps or a sundress with a jacket.

Linen suit.

Sundress? Won't the neckline be too low? I cover the collar bone.

The neckline on the dress might be too low, but might be ok with a proper jacket. I got such an ensemble from Liz Claiborne a few years ago.

Or a floral dress.

Floral dress.

That should work.

I have to start looking now, though.

Hey. I could wear it for Shavuot first, right?



*nod* My suggestion would be a pretty, summery dress, perhaps with some sort of dressy light wrap (jacket, sweater, shawl, etc.) and cute sandals if you happen to enjoy displaying painted toenails. A coordinated outfit of skirt and blouse/top would also be fine; a summer suit would probably be a little extra dressy, but if you're more comfortable that way I doubt it'd be a problem. I had an informal afternoon wedding in a park, and I told the women "dressy but comfortable, and I'm the only one who gets to wear a big white dress."

Also, in case the couple has calculated the angles wrong, pack sunglasses along with the hat. ;)

Oh, goodness. *Shoes*.

I never thought about shoes. My normal black hightops just wouldn't work, would they? I can't wear sandals - even if they looked good on my flat feet, which they don't, they aren't supportive enough.

That means getting a whole other pair of shoes. Sheesh. Do they even make pretty lace-up flats I can wear with a floral dress on Labor Day?

If your outfit has a little bit of black somewhere in it -- say, part of a print, or if you have a black lacy sweater-type thing or something -- I frankly think black hightops might be OK. Are they kind of boot-style? Or... well, what shoes do you wear with dressy outfits (shul, other weddings, etc.) normally? Make sure your outfit for this wedding sorta-kinda coordinates with those shoes, and you're there.

As long as most of your outfit looks approximately normal, the odds that the bride and/or groom will pay attention to your shoes are minimal. The odds that they will care about those shoes are even less. I can tell you what shoes the female members of my wedding party wore (that is, both our moms and my cousin), but only because we had a big pantyhose/no-pantyhose discussion and I wound up painting my mom's toenails a couple hours before the ceremony. ;)

I don't have the outfit yet. The weddding's on Labor Day - an outdoor garden afternoon affair, so black isn't appropriate at all.

I wear black high tops, as I said. Nothing else. (My other pairs of shoes are winter boots and beige canvas high tops for major fast days - I get a D in girl. Maybe a C. Also, I have a bad foot - if I don't wear shoes with serious support, I run the risk of needing a cane for a few days.)

I don't worry about coordination normally because, other than the summer, I wear black opague tights. The shoes blend in and there's no problem. But I can't do that for this.

I did find a pair of boots that I like, though, so I'm set for that. I was just panicking them because I hadn't even thought about shoes. Hat, yes, but not shoes.

I'd wear something not totally casual, but not dressy. About a business casual level but girlier than khakis, with the same shoes I wear to shul (mainly cos my shoe wardrobe is tennies, huaraches, sandals, shul shoes). If you've got anything in your wardrobe that you bought because you liked it but you weren't sure where to wear it cos it wasn't really right for shul, but it wasn't really right for the office either, this would be the place.


Do people actually do that? Buy clothes they don't know where to, um, wear?

This is why I get a D in girl, I think. I *hate* buying clothes - mostly, I need to justify the time and the expense to myself, so the only reason I'd get something is if I needed it. I *wish* it were otherwise, or I wouldn't be, you know, caught short by, "Oh, God. I need to buy a second pair of *shoes*."

So, I have one or two dressy suits, some t-shirts and other strictly day-off tops, and everything else is on the "work/shul" continuum. And that's usually fine, but since I have an excuse for something new...I am taking it.

Either a summery dress or a light skirt with a blouse would be your best bet.

I was thinking light sweater and floral skirt. I can't imagine I'll weigh less than 180 or so even with the diet - flowery dress would make me look like a walking flower garden.


Since you have indicated that you need to have laceup shoes with good support and since you don't wear pants ...

I suggest a loose flowing tunic top over the longest flowing skirt you can muster and a pair of dressy lace up ankle boots and the big straw hat.

(I can take a picture of the style of shoe I mean if you need.)

If anybody thinks this is a bit unorthodox ;) hey, you need the support (no point in being in pain and/or turning your ankle) and they are dressy shoes.

There's a eBay store called holyclothing.com that makes the kind of long flowy tunic tops and skirts I'm talking about (http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQfgtpZ1QQfrppZ25QQsassZholyclothingQ2ecom) and the prices are reasonable.

(I've also purchased from them before and had a smooth transaction, but give up to 4 weeks for the clothing to arrive.)

I'm thinking about low-heeled granny boots. I think those would be A. cute and B. perfect.

Those clothes are lovely.

They are! And granny boots would work. If you don't think black is going to work- too dark or too clunky looking- maybe white, off white or beige.