Part of the problem is their budget and the fact that she wants the wedding dinner to be kosher for me and Jonathan - pretty much the only people who will care - my inlaws eat everything but pork and shellfish (and overt meat/milk mixtures) out, and no one else she's likely to invite keeps kosher.
Last night, I told Lenny A. Jonathan and I are willing - *happy* - to help out with the catering if necessary, but if she's sold on a caterer whose level of kashrut is not up to our standards, we'll do the tv dinner thing. If we must. I really don't want to, but it's not worth making her upseet.
Jonathan wants her to get married in Brooklyn, but I'm very much worried that they won't allow mixed dancing and she very much wants that.
So far, they've rejected two kosher places for charging too much and not liking the premises and are currently looking at a Conservative synagogue in Perth Amboy. That part doesn't bother me since we won't be praying there, and I'm not bothered by the female rabbi, either.
They're not likely to have kosher witnesses anyway - and, really, at their age, I'm not so worried about that. I'd prefer it, but I can't drag two friends with me to the wedding. (Unless, I suppose, we pay for their meals completely. Which isn't the worst idea. Except, who would go to a strange place to a witness for a friend's parents for a tv dinner?)