If I were home, I'd be running around cooking and shopping and being immensely busy, but I will not be knowingly violating or benefiting from violations of yom tov. Honoring one's parents comes *secondary* to following halacha. That's also Torah.
But they will NOT come to us and we have no place to put them even if they would come, and Jonathan wants to come here so long as it's only two days, as opposed to when it abuts Shabbat and therefore is three days. I'd hate to spend Shabbat here, too. We'll be home, Gd willing, next year.
And I like my seders. They're fun - good company, good discussion and nice and relaxed. (Mom *is* a very good cook, so food is not an issue.)