So. I have quite a lot of Bernat acrylic worsted weight - smooth and light-colored enough to show stitches - and US9 bamboo needles. If all goes well, they will end up knowing how to cast-on, knit, purl and bind-off. And this will leave them with a rectangular hat. They will knit five rows of garter and the rest stockinette. The ambitious ones might knit every fifth row instead of purling it, so they make ridges. They will bind-off, and I'll sew them together. And maybe we'll make tassels.
And with that, they'll be able to knit anything they want. :)